Sunday, November 14, 2010

No Sleep Rant

I hate this part of life.
The no sleep part.
I could care less about counting sheep.
I want there to be a button that shuts down the brain for the night, that allows no thinking.
I am exhausted yet cannot sleep. It is a cruel sick twisted trick.
There is so much going on in my life. I've been very happy, but very busy. My brain is burning out. Some times I just don't want to have to think about all of it.
Sleep is my escape. But tonight and every night for the past four days, my escape route has failed me.
I guess I'll try counting some sheep. Again.

Saturday, November 6, 2010


Baby J dressed up as Nemo last weekend. He is my cute little fishy! The fin on top of his head had a squeaky toy in it. He couldn't figure out where the noise was coming from:) I'm sorry, but I just happen to find this kid adorable, hence the constant posts about him.

Saturday, October 30, 2010

O. M. G.

You don't even want to know.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Happy Sunday!

I love this picture! Baby J has no problem letting me dress him up! He is such a ham!
The rest of my family went for a mini vacation this weekend so it was Baby and Mama all weekend, which was nice. We had a visit from Aunt Catherine, and she brought over her gangsta shades for baby to try...I think I'll have to get him a pair of his own! I hope you all had a wonderful weekend. I can't believe we are at the end of October already. Time flies!

Friday, October 22, 2010

When the baby sleeps...

The mama should too! But, right now my mind is racing. It's never a good idea to eat rocky road ice cream before bed. I just know I will have crazy dreams as a result. You know, the ones that go on and on and on without end. They are usually about the stupidest things like trying to find something to wear and all you can find is life jackets, or having to defend your home from 100 guys dressed like Aladdin ( In my dreams locking the doors usually works...just saying). I usually don't dream unless I eat sugar late in the evening, so I guess I deserve them.
In honor of rambling, I am going to share some more thoughts. Or rather, picture thoughts.

The following picture sums up how I have been feeling the last three long months.
The one after that gives me a little more hope.
Goodnight everyone! I must get to bed, before Baby J decides to rise and shine:)

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

It's Tuesday...

..but, have a great rest of the week!
I will be back on Friday (or sooner, if I start having blog withdrawls).
Welcome to the new followers!
And to the rest of you...thanks for dealing with me!
P.s. Isn't this picture darling?
Makes me want to go apple picking AGAIN....
but, this time wearing those special apple picking shoes:)

Monday, October 18, 2010

On a lighter note...

A newly updated photo of my handsome little boy. I am amazed how big he is getting, and how fearless he is. Everyday he is learning something new! Let's just say I am one VERY proud mama.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Happy Sunday!

I am now officially a weekend blogger. My job starts tomorrow! I want to thank all of you for putting up with my mood swings and random posts. I love reading your blogs, which contain thoughts on everything under the sun. Your comments and kind words have helped me through a rough time. I feel better than ever before, losing weight, moving on from a "bad romance", starting school again..... the pieces are coming together. It can only get better!!!!

Have a wonderful weekend!

Friday, September 24, 2010

Poor Baby

I have the exact same baby carrier. Joshua loves being toted around in his:) I don't think I look that cool wearing it though....
P.s. Can I just say that Bradley Cooper is SUPER cute, even if he looks really down in the dumps here.

The Little Guy

These were taken while we were in Salt Lake City, Utah. I just received them yesterday. Thought I'd share:) He is already a lot bigger! He was sleeping when we arrived at the photo shoot. They did a couple shots of him sleeping and he woke up right before they took this one. He was so happy to see all the attention he was getting! This kid is such a ham!

Sunday, September 19, 2010

7 Things I love

apple picking
goofing off with my siblings
raspberry lemonade scented chapstick
no shoes
when my son reaches for me
knowing everything is just fine

Friday, September 17, 2010

Mama Stuff

Baby J was up ALL night last night. Poor guy is getting over a stomach bug. I sat with him in the rocker and woke up an hour later with him sound asleep snuggled in the blanket I had when I was a baby. He just wanted me to hold him. Every time I attempted to put him down in his crib he cried.
I remember how I felt when I was sick even as a teenager. I always wanted my mom. It's just hard because all I can do is rock him and sing to him, I can't take away the discomfort. It pains me not to be able to soothe him completely. Poor little dear...
He woke up in smiles this morning, and I with huge bags under my eyes. Hopefully whatever it was is gone for good.

Monday, September 13, 2010

Sad is Bad!

New Rule! No more Sad Stuff!!! I am done with it.
From now on I will be have posts that are positive and uplifting.
I got depressed reading my own blog today! Sorry Everyone!
I need to pull myself out of WOE IS ME land and just BE HAPPY!
I have a awesome kid and an awesome family....
YOU all are awesome too!!!
RaWr!!!!!! ( That was a happy rawr!)

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Heart! We Will Forget Him

Heart, we will forget him!
You an I, tonight!
You may forget the warmth he gave,
I will forget the light.

When you have done, pray tell me
That I my thoughts may dim;
Haste! lest while you're lagging.
I may remember him!
- Emily Dickinson

Such a lovely poem, yet so sad. I hate this broken heart. But this too shall pass.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

George: You know, whenever anyone says something really funny and I laugh I always look around to see if you think it's funny too. Even when you are not there, I look around.
-Grey's Anatomy

Sunday, August 29, 2010

New Look

I changed my Blog Header today. I felt like something new. I have discovered the amazing world of That is where I play now. Other than that, there is not much going on. I am home and happy to see all my brothers and sisters. I spent the weekend with my sister Catherine( pictures to come). Her birthday is tomorrow. I can't believe she is already turning 19! It's super late and I need to sleep( If Baby J will let me). Goodnight!!!

Saturday, August 28, 2010

Carousel Baby

He loved it!!!!!!!!!! He smiled the the whole time:) My son is awesome.

Monday, August 23, 2010

Leaving Salt Lake....

I'm gonna miss it. This was the best vacation ever and I learned so much about myself. It was the best thing I could have done for me and my son. So, now I'm leaving the city lights and gorgeous mountain views and heading back home to put the pieces of my life back together. But, things won't be going back to normal. I'm stronger and tougher and no one is going to mess with my life or my heart again....I'll miss you Salt Lake City family. You are all awesome!!!!

New Perspective

On Everything! I visited Photobucket today...can you tell?

Friday, August 13, 2010

Baby Boy

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Eye On The Prize

If I can do it anyone can. I have lost ten pounds in 3 weeks and I feel so much better already. I am trying like crazy to get rid of my weight that I gained while I was pregnant just 5 months ago. I gained 60 lbs while I was preggers!!!! 10 down 50 to go!!!!!! This is a little pep talk to myself, because I am being tempted by the brownies in the kitchen. Oh, and Josh is 5 months today!!!!!!!! Love you SOOOOO much!

Sunday, August 8, 2010

Secret Life of Bees

Amazing Movie. My Grandma suggested I watch it and I loved it! It was SO sad, but SO beautiful. I don't think I ever cried so much during a movie. It reminded me of my darling sister, Helen. Have a Happy Sunday Everyone!

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Plan B

So much happened in July. Some things are too personal to blog. All that I know is I'm breathing, and my son and I are safe. My heart may be broken, but time heals all.
My son is the single most important thing to me. I fell in love about 5 months ago to the sweetest little bald toothless guy. He stole my heart and manages to do it again and again with the littlest things. A gummy grin, a slobbery fist, his curious blue eyes, his little laugh. It all melts this mama.

I never imagined I'd be 21 years old with a new baby and not have someone by my side. But no one is better than the wrong someone. This baby of mine, he is something. He deserves the best life has to offer. We will have a wonderful life he and I. I have so many plans for our future. With God, Family , and Friends....everything will be just ducky:)

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Me This Week

Listening to Tony Robbins
Working Out twice a day.
Loving the Mountains.
Visiting Family I've missed sooo much.
Showing my son new things and new places.
Finding Myself.
Finding Peace.
Forever loving Joshua.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

New Mama

So, I have started a working out with my Aunt Merrilee. She's kicking my butt. She has got me doing sit ups, lunges, planks, and treadmill work. I've been doing weight training. We took before pictures..and hopefully our after pictures will look awesome. I'm also working on my tan. Vacation is awesome:) We had a 70's dress up birthday party for Mer. Everybody stared when we went out to eat and at the movies. We saw the movie Salt because it has girl power:) It was actually pretty good. Joshua is loving meeting all his cousins and relatives...he still doesn't know what to make of Gramp.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Downside Up


Sometimes just when your heart feels as though it belongs, when the fear of change is gone everything goes topsy turvy. Is it so much to ask that love last forever. Is it too much to ask that love be true. One things is for certain, I will love him forever and a day. I will always love him. He is my first love, the father of my child, my grow old with lover. Bu we changed. I changed when I became a mother,

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

My Son

You make every day wonderful.
I can't believe how fast you are growing,
how much you are learning.
I am so proud.
You are my everything.
Thank You for being my darling little boy.
Thanks for being my son.
My Son.

Monday, July 5, 2010

Ordinary Day

And as he spoke, he spoke ordinary words
Although they did not feel
For I felt what I had not felt before
And you'd swear those words could heal.
And as I looked up into those eyes
His vision borrows mine.
And I know he's no stranger,
For I feel I've held him for all of time.

Please come with me,
See what I see.
Touch the stars for time will not flee.
Time will not flee.
Can you see?
-Vanessa Carlton

Sunday, June 27, 2010

Childhood Days

There's one little guy missing from this picture. He was born six years later, and we are so glad he was. Anyways these are my siblings, the PK's (priests kids). Behind us you can see my fathers collection of religious books which has greatly increased in size since the taking of this photo. I found this picture today and just wanted to share. I miss being a kid.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

End Of June

It's almost July...
things all around me are changing.
I think the reality of being a grown up has hit me. Hard.
But, there's more good than bad. More blue than grey.
And more love than anything.

I rush home everday from work to my little family, Jarrod, Baby J and Nibbles( who I have officially dubbed Nibbles Dolores Petunia aka Nibbletunia).
I don't think there is any hardship love cannot somehow overcome or at least make easier to bear. Mix it with hardwork and a good can get through anything. Yay for love!

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Friday, June 11, 2010

Just Because

This won the awesome thing of the day award. Booyah.

Thursday, June 3, 2010


I'm doing some belated spring cleaning.
Well, I'm trying to in between feeding and changes.
It's funny living life with one arm, the other being occupied by a little bald toothless diaper man.
He is wearing red socks on his hands right now, because he keeps scratching his face and his mittens don't fit him anymore.
So, now we call him mitten man.
I love my kid.

Friday, May 21, 2010

The Red Balloon

I loved this movie when I was younger, but I loved the book first.
My mother had kept the book from her childhood. It was oversized and had pictures from the film. My sisters and I would read it, and snicker at the funny clothes the children wore. But mostly we we loved the idea of a balloon with a mind of its own. Each of us dreamnt of our own "Ballon Rouge".
I have been slacking in my effort to post everyday. I've been busy since returning to work, but I will always make time for this blog "pet' of mine. It's existence does good things for my sanity.
Happy Friday Folks!

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Please Don't Lick The Baby

Jarrod's dog is so sweet. He is a Basset Hound.
His name is Nibbles.
His favorite toy is a sqeaky hot dog.
He likes to lay around and cuddle.
He is a professional fly catcher, and he hunts them with such gusto.
He has a couple flaws though, we all do of course.

He tries to snatch dirty diapers and eat them whole.
He has a thing for baby toys. He wants to nibble on them.

He does a disturbing thing when he hears the squeak of his favorite toy. No further comments.
And, he always wants to lick the baby, preferrably his face.
It sickens me, because I can just imagine where that slobbering basset hound tounge has been.
But I feel so bad when I ward him off, because he licks the baby ever so tenderly.
He loves Josh. When Josh cries, Nibbles whines. When Josh comes home after being gone all day, Nibbles forgets his need to pee and needs baby face licking time.
It makes Nibbles happy.
Josh doesn't seem to mind.
So, I remain the guilty party.
Could we meet in the middle and permit baby toe licking?
Please Don't Lick The Baby.

Friday, May 14, 2010

Beautiful Blogger Award

I want to thank Delilah from The Delilah Show for this award. The Beautiful Blog Award. Thank you Delilah!!!!!!!

So now I must share 7 facts about myself. These are not in any order whatsoever.

Fact 1: I've been to almost every state in the U.S. , but never outside it's borders.

Fact 2: I'm allergic to Cantaloupe.
Fact 3: A famous Russian Chef stayed at my house for 3 months, and cooked EVERY meal the entire time.

Fact 4: My hair is Super Curly and when it rains it goes POOF!
Fact 5: I sing in the church choir.

Fact 6: At the moment, my toes are painted hot pink.

Fact 7: I love jumping in puddles.
I pass the award to a lovely blog-
Moments and Impressions

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Why Do You Let Me Stay Here?

I would describe the music as folk music- 70's style.
This band is She and Him.
I love their music.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Saturday, May 1, 2010

It's Just A Game

I have a confession to make. I play Farmville on facebook. When I first saw a family member playing the game, I made fun of it. Then I was asked to just start a farm so they could have more neighbors. I wasn't ACTUALLY going to play. It just happened. I became a fake farmer

So yes, I fake milk fake cows a couple times a week. I plant pumpkins, grapes, and watermelon and harvest them for what? I'm really not sure.